I post lots of pictures on Social Media. All of my pictures on Instagram, Facebook and Twitter are shot with my iPhone. I’ll admit, if I ever lost my iPhone I would lament not the lost contacts or calendar but the lost pictures! I was recently at a PTA event with a friend when at a booth there was a chance to earn a PTA discount by snapping a picture.
Well, I jumped all over that noise and shot and tagged this gem:
A bit later there were two comments, both alluding to my pregnancy. But here’s the thing:
I’m Not Pregnant.
The shirt I was wearing highlighted my bloated carb belly.
Needless to say, once I revealed that I was in fact NOT in a delicate situation, there was a bit of embarrassment all around. There is no one right way to move past this situation, but as this is not the first time I’ve been asked if I was pregnant (when I was not) I’ve developed a few tips:
1. Don’t Take It Personally: Unless the person REALLY hates you… like on a troll like level, there is a good chance it was an honest mistake. In my case, one gal had heard through the grapevine about a friend being pregnant and thought it was me.
2. Respond with Grace: The person who makes the mistaken comment feels 110% times worse than you do. Once the mistake was acknowledged, my friend apologized profusely. At first I was going to write something like, “It’s OK.” or “Don’t worry about it!” but I thought that she would feel more closure by hearing “I forgive you.”
3. (Try to) Let it Go: I know. You are tired of the song, but the hardest part is letting it go. After I saw the comments, I started scrutinizing the picture. Some of my internal monologue:
- If only I hadn’t worn that shirt!
- Why am I standing like that?
- Why did I eat that muffin?!
- Why can’t you lose weight you fatty-fatty-fat-fat??
Yes, that last one was harsh and those all ran through my head. I’m telling you, if I had the cash I probably would have booked Lipo and a Tummy Tuck right there. (OK not really) It’s a reality for me and a struggle. I’ve had 3 kids and I am still nursing one. I can grab hands-full of fat on my belly and I hate it and I’m trying to get rid of it but we know that you can’t spot reduce.
But I need to let it go. I can’t let this drag me down into a pint of gelato… or pecan clusters.
4. Reframe: I love babies. Most of my friends love babies. The thought of having another baby is exciting to me. The comment made was not to be insulting but it was one of excitement at the thought of new life. Because, seriously, is there not much better than a pregnant woman?
We’re all going to hear comments we don’t jive with. Hopefully these tips will help you move on with grace.
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